We, the members of The Boo Bush43 Club, stand together to fight against this wicked man in a mask who dares to kick us troubled people in the nuts. Who the hell does he think he is?
Bush43 is a "hero" in Pacific City who insists on using inhumane tactics to apprehend troubled people. We call upon the public and our elected leaders to put a stop to this menace before it's too late. How many more people must lose their ability to have children or use of their privates simply because this guy obviously has a problem of his own that he does not know how to properly deal with?
"My shrink said I was only acting out my anger over my mother never hugging me," says founding member of the BB43C, Pokey Sharp Guy. "And then this punk comes along and instead of helping me with a hug he KICKS ME IN THE NUTS! I peed blood for weeks!"
"I'll never be able to have children," says another founding member, Mr. Lucky Dogg, "and my psycosis has only gotten worse because of his over board tactics. All he needed to do was ask politely for me to stop, a simply 'please' and 'thank you', but, NOOOOOOOOOO, he just came right up and kicked me in the jimmy so hard I could breathe. I swear I was choking on my boys."
"I was going to be a kick ass miner," says former villian and weightlifter MinerMan, "but Bush43 had to come along and kick me in the nuts all because I needed to rob a bank to feel fulfilled in life. Now I feel like half the man I used to be and it's not just because I can't find my left nut. DAMN YOU BUSH43!!!!"
"He kicked me in the nuts and couldn't even correctly pronounce my name!" says another founding member, Staticy.
Bush43 needs to be stopped! He has prevented the healthy expression of cries for help from too many of Pacific City's troubled youth and not so youth.
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1. He's ugly. 2. Despite being ugly, he still gets all the chicks, which is really weird because chicks are supposed to dig bad asses and dangerous guys like us villianous types. 3. He keeps kicking us in the nuts. 4. He wears a stupid mask. 5. He's stupid. 6. He smells. 7. His mom has a mustache (rumour) 8. He's invulnerable. 9. He's super strong. 10. He keeps kicking us in the nuts. |
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Devious Plots to Destroy Bush43!
1. Cover him in honey and bury him in an ant hill
Pros This would rule and be really neat to watch as the ants chewed him up.
Cons We got to get him first.
2. Break into his house and steal his mask
Pros He'd be unable to go running around without his mask cause then everyone would know who he is and would make fun of him all the time for being a dork.
Cons We don't know who he is so we can't break into his house and he'd probably kick us in the nuts while we tried to break in.
3. Break into his house and lock his mask inside a safe that we'd leave in his house
Pros Even more evil than simply stealing it, we'd lock it right in front of him. It'd be so close but JUST out of reach, it's brilliant!
Cons See #2 as well as the fact he's superstrong so he'd probably just break the safe open (over one of our heads, that bastard).
4. Build a super bad ass super robot to hunt him down and kick his ass and then have him committed to an asylum so he can see what it's like
Pros Robots rule and we could sit back and watch the fun.
Cons It's already been done.
5. Kick HIM in the nuts
Pros Give 'im a taste of his own damn medicine!
Cons He's super strong so it might not hurt him. That and in order to kick him you have to get really close, which means he can kick you.
What people are saying about our cause:
"I had no idea Bush43 was so evil and vile. I hope he gets kicked in the nuts or run over by a truck that's more invulnerable than he is."
- Random Hot Chick that I Banged.
"He's so evil. I hope you guys beat him up and then cut off his *censored*." Okay, fine, she said "cock".
- Another Hot Chick that I Banged. I'm such a ladies man. So much more than Bush43 will ever be. Look at all these women!
"Bush43 stoll the election and is illegally sitting as president of the unites statees. I say was impeech him so we can get the tru president, Al Gore, back into office!"
- some guy who's REALLY pissed about Bush43!
"EAT HIM!!!!!
- Hannibal Lecter
And frightened this poor child!
Write your political person of choice!
Get some super sweet heat shooter glasses and join our fight!
Tell others about this horrible menace!
Look to the stars for alien assistance in our battles!
Allies in our Fight
Democrats
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